That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
