high people should be assigned attendants
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
