it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Farmville is her only friend.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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