Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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