They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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