I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize