I want to stick my p in your. b.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
