Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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