I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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