I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
