what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
