just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Randomize
