he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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