I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
