would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
