My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Randomize
