I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
