i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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