She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
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