you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
