dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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