i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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