I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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