Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
