Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
