if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
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