ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Randomize
