Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
