just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
