I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
