Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize