I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
