ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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