Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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