he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
