Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
