How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
