What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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