I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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