I think i peed on brittanys purse
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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