a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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