I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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