I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
