seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
