that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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