Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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