in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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