I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
