Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
the raccoons are back...
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