Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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